“No,” I replied, looking away from him. “Actually, where I’m at right now is probably the farthest I’ve felt from suicide in a long time. The closest was the night my father kicked me out…”
Archer pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around me. It felt so good to be in his arms, to have him comforting me. Honestly, he was a big reason why suicide was such a far away option now. Him and his entire family. I had never been supported before; not like they did. I was luckier than I had ever realized. I’d had a family right here the whole time who wanted to be there for me.
When we pulled out of the embrace, the two of us sat down on the couch so we could face my friends.
“Do you remember last year, when I was out of school for a week?” I asked them all.
Everyone nodded their heads as Varick said, “We figured your dad left bruises on your face again. He never let you go to school with visible wounds.”
“I wanted to march down the street and give him a taste of his own medicine,” Archer growled, and it made me smile to see him so protective.
“He did hit me, but that wasn’t why I was out,” I explained. “He hit me a few times on the back and side, leaving some bad bruises, but I could hide them. It all felt like so much that night though, so I took every pill I could find in the medicine cabinet. Eliza found me and called 911.
My parents were so angry with me. They kept me in a unit for a few days, trying to get me on medicine for depression and anxiety, as well as in therapy. They stopped me going to therapy, but I could walk and fill my own prescription, so I’ve been doing that for a while. Anyway, that’s when I started writing that song.”
What I didn’t mention was that I worked to finish the song after I recovered from my father’s beating this last time. I had considered, instead of going to Salt Lake to find a shelter, to just go up to one of the mountains or canyons and die. It didn’t happen because of Archer though. Afterward, I felt the need to use art to get the feelings out, and thus, the song was finished and I had been putting the finishing touches on it.
“If writing and performing this helps you, then we’re all in,” Varick said, and the others agreed.
~~~
After that, most of my free time that wasn’t spent with Archer was all about practicing with the band. February came and that also meant our audition. We put everything we had into it, playing three songs in total in front of a group of people deciding who would go on to the local battle. They didn’t tell us anything after we performed, just thanked us and sent us on our way. We were told we would find out soon who was moving forward.
On the day the posters for the Battle were going to be put up around the school, announcing who was in it, Varick, Zach, Nigel, and I stayed at the school late rather than practicing to find out. Archer was in a Student Council meeting, so it worked out anyway. We waited around the grounds of the school for the people that would be putting up the fliers, and we weren’t disappointed.
We ran up to one of the people putting them up, and they were happy to give one to us. We moved over to the side and looked through the list and saw our band name on there. Cheers rang out down the hall as we hugged each other, jumping up and down in excitement. The first battle would take place in May, and then the Battle in Salt Lake would be in July.
“Go tell Lover Boy,” Varick said to me, handing the flier over before they went off to go home.
I ran down to where the student council was meeting, practically on cloud nine. I was so excited to show Archer the flier. He would be just as happy and excited as we were. So it was a bit of a shock to my system when the first person to come out of the room and down the hall towards me was Gus. I put the flier in my back pocket, not wanting him to grab it from me while I waited for Archer to appear.
Gus was stalking forward, his stance angry and menacing. I tried to move to the side, and he stalked past me, looking like he was going to his car, before he stopped, turned around, and came back to punch me hard in the face. I stumbled back and fell down onto my ass ungracefully, stunned by the sudden hit to my cheek.
“What the hell is your problem?” I yelled as I got back to my feet.
“Your boyfriend is my fucking problem!” he growled at me. “Archer just called for a no-confidence vote and ousted me from my position! He said something about how I’ve treated you, of all fucking things! As if I didn’t treat you right or something! Well now I’ll show you both how well I held back!”
“You think you treated me well?” I cried as his hands turned into fists. “Are you insane?”
He swung again, this time getting me in the stomach, and it knocked the air right out of me. I didn’t let him drop me to the ground again this time. I grabbed onto the wall to keep myself standing and then straightened up before I swung back, connecting with his jaw, which sent him back against the wall with a groan of pain.
Gus grabbed the hair of my mohawk before bringing his fist back to my face, hitting me in the lip hard this time. I pulled away from him hard, ripping some of my hair out as I got away, and he was moving toward me again. Before he could do anything though, someone’s body slammed hard into him, and they both went rolling down the hallway, fighting each other as they went.
Archer got the upper hand and ended up on top of Gus, his legs around Guy’s waist as Archer grabbed him by the shirt collar and started hitting him. “Stop…fighting…me…asshole!”
Eventually Gus stilled underneath him and stopped fighting. One of the other students, named McKayla Guthman, who happened to be the secretary, came running up to make sure I was okay while Archer told Gus to go home and find a way to chill, or he could go to the principal to talk about what was going on.
“You already tried to get Jason killed by his father,” Archer growled at him. “Don’t push your luck. You may have already gotten into college, but I bet the admissions people would love to hear what you’ve been up to lately.”
Archer moved off of Gus and let him get up, and Gus stalked away from the entire group without another word.
“He’s such a prick,” McKayla said to me.
“That’s an understatement,” I groaned.
Archer was next to me before I realized he had even gotten up, and he had his hands on my face trying to make sure I was okay. “I’m going to kill him for putting a hand on you like this.”
“I’m fine, Archer,” I sighed out. “I’ve had much worse, remember?”
“That doesn’t make it okay,” he growled.
I looked at him with all the affection I could, wanting to tell him how much I loved him, but keeping it tightly inside. The other members of the student council told us to let them know if we needed anything, and told me to feel better, before leaving us to walk the other way down the hallway and toward Archer’s car. He was still fuming a bit, angry that Gus had dared to put his hands on me, while I was just basking in Archer’s protectiveness like a blanket that could protect me from everything.
As soon as we got down into the basement, Archer went upstairs to get an ice pack for my face, despite my protests. Archer was on a mission though to make sure I was okay, and nothing I said was going to stop him. He placed the ice pack on my cheek, looking into my eyes with a gently worried expression.
“I promise you,” I told him, moving the ice pack away as he put some strips over the open gash on my lip. “These wounds are nothing. They barely hurt.”
“I don’t want them swelling,” he said softly.
“I love how much you care about people,” I murmured to him, touched by his loving actions.
“Not people, Jason,” he replied quietly. “You.”
“I love you,” I whispered, almost afraid to say it out loud, but my feelings wouldn’t let me stay silent anymore.
Archer looked at me in wonder for a moment, his lips parting in surprise before his expression changed to a big smile. It was the kind of smile that could light up the entire city, and it made my heart beat faster.
“I love you too,” he replied just as quietly before bringing his lips to mine.
The ice pack was forgotten as he moved closer to me, his body pressed against mine as we shared a feverish kiss. We broke apart only long enough to pull our shirts off, and then we were on each other again. He pushed me back onto the couch and covered my body with his. We made out for a while like that until Archer finally pulled away, ever conscious of trying to make sure I was comfortable with whatever we were doing. He got back into a sitting position, and then I sat up as well before standing up all the way.
Archer looked up at me as I gave him a mischievous grin. I backed away towards my bedroom, unbuckling my belt and pulling it off, letting it drop to the ground as he watched me. I unzipped my pants and let them fall, stepping out of them lightly. I made a motion for him to follow me and then went into the bedroom and crawled onto the bed.
By the time I had turned around to lay seductively on the bed, Archer had made it into my room and gotten his pants off as well. His blue eyes darkened with lust as he took me in, and then he crawled onto the bed with me, hovering over me for a moment.
“Take those off,” Archer ordered, his voice husky and deep.