Make interpersonal relationships with my friend

“Well, I’ve never talked to anyone about this before,” she said nervously, “and it’s really embarrassing, you’ll think I’m super weird and it’s probably going to mess this all up, but I’m hoping we can still be friends and work together.”

“Daicy, I have some weird ways myself.” I said. This caused her to bring her eyes back up to meet mine with a curious look. Squeezing her hands I said, “I promise whatever you tell me we’ll still be friends and we can still work together.”

“Okay, here goes,” she said, taking a deep breath and looking down again, “um… well, it’s about sex. I know a lot of guys don’t think women have sex fantasies, but we do. Some of us do. I do.”

My heart started beating a little faster. Where was this going to go?

“I know that’s true Daicy. I think some guys are threatened by that but I’m not, I think fantasies are a natural thing for both women and men.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear you say that to Johnson , but… I’ve had some kind of crazy ones for a long time, back to when I was a kid. And it’s not like I think people have to act out every fantasy they have, Xavier and I didn’t. I hate to use the word but Xavier and I had pretty “normal” sex, you know? And I was fine with that.”

“So are you saying you have some weird fantasies?”

“Umm… yeah, and I’m not obsessed with them or anything… it’s some very weird stuff I’ve never acted out, things I’ve never even thought about acting out… I really didn’t think I ever would, and that’s been okay! I don’t think a relationship is only about sex anyway, or people have to like all the same things, but…”

I waited for her to continue but she seemed to be stuck. I knew it was time for me to start opening up in the same way Daicy was, but I was feeling conflicted; on the one hand I was excited about sharing fantasies with her, but on the other I was worried that mine were worlds away from hers.

“But what?” I said. “Daicy, you can tell me. Listen, I have to fess up here… there are some weird things I’m interested in too. Are we talking about kinky stuff?”

She looked up at me with an anxious but hopeful expression, and her next words came out in a rush.

“Yes,” she said, “and Johnson , what’s really hard to explain is… there’s something about you that makes me think about these things more, a lot more, and now I can’t get them off my mind. I know this sounds crazy, but… being with you makes me want to act out stuff I’ve been keeping inside as just fantasies, and it… it’s getting in the way now. So there… I’ve said it.”

“Wow,” I said, “I feel kind of flattered!”

“Well I hope you’re still flattered when I tell you the things I think about.”

I took a deep breath. “Is this about BDSM stuff Daicy? Do you want me to, you know… tie you up?”

There was a long pause as she looked away, seeming to study something in the room, and then brought her eyes back to mine. “No,” she said, “I want to tie you up.”

My heart started beating faster and I felt like an electric current was humming through my body… and I could feel it building up between my legs. Could this really be happening?

“I can’t believe I’m telling you this Johnson … maybe it’s the wine, I should just shut up and take things as they come, I’ve probably ruined things between us… I really do want to be with you, but these feelings are so strong I thought it might be a problem if we got involved and I kept it a secret… I’m sorry,” she said, looking away again.

My mind was racing. All of a sudden a door was opening, did I really want to walk through it? Yes, of course I did.

“So… the thoughts you have are about dominating me Daicy? You’d really want to tie me up?” I asked.

“Yes,” she said, “and I’m not saying I have to, it’s just really distracting me and I had to say something.”

It was now or never. “Daicy,” I said, “I have to tell you… I fantasize about being dominated by a woman. I fantasize about it a lot.”

“You do? Are you serious Johnson ?” she said, turning back to me with a surprised look in her eyes, “you’d really want that, you’re not just saying it to make me feel better?”

“Yes, I’m serious Daicy. I’ve had these thoughts for a long time,” I told her.

“Oh God,” she said. “Johnson , I… Johnson , it wouldn’t, you know, threaten your masculinity or something like that?”

“No, it wouldn’t be Daisy. But how would you think about it, would being submissive make me… less of a man in your eyes?”

“Oh no! Johnson , you always seem so confident, so self-assured, like you don’t have to prove anything to anybody. You seem so strong in a quiet way, I think that’s why you bring out my ‘inner Domme,’ she said with a nervous laugh. “I fantasize about… having control of you, and it just makes me dizzy to think about it.”

“Well,” I said, smiling, “I’d be okay with my masculinity if you were. I’m really attracted to you Daicy, so this is sounding pretty amazing… I mean, really amazing! I just, you know, wouldn’t want you to think less of me for being submissive.”

“Oh Johnson , I wouldn’t at all,” she said, squeezing my hands more tightly and raising them up between us for emphasis, “I’m really attracted to you too, I’m sure that wouldn’t change.” I could see in her eyes it was true and it gave me the confidence to take it further.

“Do you think you’d like to go ahead and… act some things out?” I asked her.

“Well… if we both want to, I guess we should try,” she replied, “but this is all happening so fast Johnson , can we talk about it some more?”

“Sure we can, let’s start by making a safe space right here Daicy. A place that’s safe for fantasies, for needs, desires… fears… let’s tell each other everything and not worry about being judged or disapproved of. What do you think?”

“Yes, okay… I’m still embarrassed, but I’ll try not to be.”

I knew I had to open up to her more now but I didn’t know how far she wanted to go with this. I didn’t know what dominating really meant to her, and I worried that my thoughts might be too extreme.

“Listen Daicy,’ I said nervously, “Some of my fantasies might be more weird than yours.”

“Oh I don’t know about that Johnson ,” she said, giving me that crooked grin and bringing our hands back down to her lap. “What do you think about when you fantasize about a woman dominating you?”

“Okay, well… First I have to tell you I don’t have much interest in a lot of the stuff I see in BDSM porn, with these angry looking women all dressed up in black leather. The role play turns me off, it’s too theatrical; the way I always think about it is I want it to be something… real.”